Can Purell be used as lube?
I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
I kept telling myself all night that it was completely okay for me to lose all sense of my morals because it was my birthday.
had to bail. she had her cat tattooed on her
you're not a real person. you're actually just like a box of wine that can talk
Woke up and there was a kayak in the pool. Are you alive?
Grandpa got a dui while riding a horse. This is what I need to live up to.
Come to office depot with me I need help picking out a daily planner that will help me keep all of my casual sex dates organized.
We watched game of thrones, broke up and I drove away blasting ridin solo while he dougied
Can you please venmo me emergency money? i have no pants.
Drunk within and hour of coming home from work, merry christmas bitch
Watch out for the bush at the end of your steps. it comes out of nowhere
I was stuffing my face while buying a brownie and coffee and some kid I fucked came up behind me and said. Someone's hungry.
There. There is gum on my butt cheek IT IS NOT MINE
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
Randomize
