Oh man I wish you'd been in the car w/ me today. I followed a school bus home filled w/ young boys and I flipped them off the entire way. They loved it.
You had a beer at 10:30 this morning?
Ya, I didn't have any Tylenol.
He came through my line today and bought designer impostor perfume, just for men gel, and astroglide. I almost DIED.
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
Just had to explain to the nurse WHERE I have poison ivy. Great Day
I just want you to sit on my face and to tell you you're pretty. Most girls would leap at this opportunity.
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
I was about to send you a concerned-for-your-safety text b/c it took you more than ten seconds to respond to a text that mentioned both the bar and lesbians
when you wake up in a apartment hallway wearing someone else's shoes, you can pretty much assume last night was a success.
I just had a contest with the toilet to see who could hold their breath longest.
I won
How would I get in touch with Carly Rae Jepsen if I wanted to thank her for the loss of my virginity?
he said he'd buy me TWO burritos if I took my shirt off
My goal is to not catch on fire... But if i have to dance im going to dance regardless of the danger
Sorry, I was watching the Olympic story about the Canadian guy and drinking out of the prescription bottle and crying because it was so beautiful.
Well it might’ve been because you asked to play What Makes You Beautiful at the club
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