We hit a deer, sort of a buzz kill. But it's fine.
I wouldn't call it sex. It's like when you put a plug in a socket half way. It's not all the way in but it still turns on the light.
When i light up a cigarette people look at of like i'm going to pee on their children.
she keeps giving me cups of everbeer.. its everclear and beer mixed. i guess its blackout or backout time
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
The only thing that was weird was that it WASN'T weird when she got out of the shower and saw me blowing him.
the japanese bartender dressed as a cowboy in assless chaps just told me i was too drunk for another shot
You challenged yourself to walk backwards all the way to the bar... And you did
She showed me her tits and my first thought was "I want these to feed my future children." I'm scared.
I've been smoking weed using candles all week and I just found a lighter. This may truly be the happiest moment of my life. It's embarrassing how excited I got
you know she was a bad idea when your mom offers to pay for an eHarmony account
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
Uhm I have a bottle of tequila, a gallon of orange juice, and leggings. Now ask me again how hard im going? And that doesn't cover tomorrow.
The dentist walked in on me trying to bottle some laughing gas to take home with me. That high.
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
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