We need to start having sex underwater more often.
She threw up in my garbage can last night and walked home with it this morning so she could clean it out...
She is dropping it off on the way to the bar at 7.
he has the hands of the vagina gods.
no, throwing your underwear at it is not the solution to everything
Are you complaining because you're getting too much sex to find the time to masturbate?
Well, when you say it like that it sounds silly.
Come over. We have tacos... And girls who took their clothes off. But mainly, tacos.
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
Pounded a bottle of Moscato in my underwear while watching Pretty Little Liars...am I really gonna be 30 next year?
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
When I woke up this morning I swear my mouth tasted like dick and rolaids.
Ladies night is a gift from god. If it weren't for that, I'd probably be selling my eggs for booze money.
I am cleaning melted cheese out of my hair. This is a new experience for me
I'm at the drive thru window, five minutes out. If the bathtub is empty or you're dressed when I arrive I'm not sharing.
Forget Covid themed costumes. I need one that attracts a quality penis
preferably one with a six figure job and a boat
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