now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
I didn't take her seriously until she snorted that ramen noodle flavor packet...
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
We're trying to leave but amy's hitting on the guy who mans the nacho cart
Just realized how sopa could affect my ability to watch porn, son of a bitch
I woke up five hours later with a mouthful of Jimmy John's while clinging to my sandwich.
Question: If I got in a car accident and lost my memory of us, would you work your way back just so we could be fuck buddies again?
I'm watching The Vow and just need to know that I'm loved in some way
I got laxative. And a toothbrush. Because who wants to buy just laxative on a Friday night?
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
Also I'm sorry for asking you to shave my vagina for me last night
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
Pregnancy has ruined porn for me. I can't watch a hot chick get it on without being jealous of her perfectly waxed shit. I can't even see my shit.
then you dropped a clam in a draught beer like it was a drop shot and and started chugging as beer spewed all over your body.
YOUR VAGINA IS SO CUTE IT'S LIKE A LITTLE MACAROON
Randomize
