so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
I just heard a girl in all seriousness say, "I told him I'm not a stalker. I just really really want to talk to him."
Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
you spent 5 minutes trying to open an empty PBR and kept saying "don't worry i'll get it i've been working out"
She left scratches down my back from her wedding ring. Her husband seems like a nice guy though, judging by the scratches it had to be at least a carat.
Holy mother of cocks. I was grind-with-my-boss drunk last night.
My dad told me my only assignment from now til graduation is to not die. it's a legit concern for him.
To do list: put blue gatorade in a windex spray bottle. spray it into my mouth in public so people think i'm drinking windex.
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
Well I'm going to San Francisco next weekend for pride. I'm sure I'll end up drunk and on a beach at some point.
i think the realest test of our friendship is how hot your sister looks right now
SHE MASTURBATED TO THE THOUGHT OF ME HAVING AN ALL DUDE THREESOME WITH HER EX BOYFRIENDS.
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
One minute I'm going home the next I'm getting railed on the back 9.
His sisters are going to have a heyday finding all those condoms in their bunk beds.
Randomize
