apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
I bet the first cavemant to make fire got so much pussy
and this is why i am such an inspirational person, i am the Joel Osteen of alcoholics.
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
porn star boner night. come get it.
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
I didn't scare your mother by showing up on the roof, did I?
I thought I walked in on an orgy of smurfs. Man I love shrooms
We somehow managed to get the sumo-wrestler costume into the washing machine, but I don't think the cupcake icing completely came off... And it still smells like tequila.
Our funnel is on top of our neighbors roof.
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
My goal in life is to ruin sex for someone. To be so mindblowingly unreal that they can never find anyone like me ever again. So far it's going well.
Operation terrify all men while simultaneously make them fall in love with me is going quite swimmingly so far
My dog misses eating marshmallows out of your butt when you're passed out. That bordered on sex abuse, now that I think about it. My bad.
Randomize
