Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
My 40 year old neighbors are throwing a party for their eight year old niece's birthday. It's 1am and they're still partying hard. Harder than me. It's Saturday. Just say it, I'm a disgrace to the generation.
We fucked standing up with my right leg over his shoulder. Thank you mom and dad for having once enrolled me in gymnastics. It has finally paid off
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
Did we both pass out talking about cake last night?
I was so high I thought there were pigeons in my room. Long story short there are now donut crumbs all around my bedroom.
THERE IS A WINE CUBE IN MY ASS THIS IS NOT GOING AS PLANNED
You told your mom that it was your second day sober. I think she believed it until you jumped off the balcony
I should become her mentor. Get her life back together for her
You mean sponsor?
Also this time, I didn't have a random creepy guy come up from behind me, grab my junk, and whisper "where's the cocaine?" in my ear. So that's also a win.
You can trust me. I'm unemployed and not wearing pants.
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
I stopped telling people I'm a pansexual unless they ask first, really tired of explaining what that means.
Randomize
