he kept looking at my chin until i asked why, then he just said he was making sure his balls didnt leave a mark.
Please explain to me why I only attract Mormon guys. Just explain that to me.
I think it's God trying to counter your lustful nature. Imagine if Agnostics liked you. You'd never come out of your bedroom.
please tell me if i'm home and in my bed
negative
come find me please
Just got laid for the first time in 3 yrs, 10 mo, 1 wk & 2 days. YESSSS.
i got last night's adventure to take the garbage out when he was leaving. my vagina is THAT good.
Ice cream: Good. Fraternity: Good. Eating ice cream off a Skid Row bum's ass crack in order to get into a Fraternity: Homoerotic at best. I quit.
I just tried to text you by typing "whoa" into my contacts.
What vodka is american?
Skyy. I already looked it up for 4th of july.
Over 50% of the drunkest nights I have ever had began with me saying "I'll just drink my dinner" to you.
Girl I love you like I've been drinking all day
I've had more jaegerbombs than I can count on 3 fingers
I just turned down a booty call because I'm having a Star Wars movie marathon
He bought me shrimp and alcohol and referred to himself as daddy. I am in love.
Listening to sad Lana Del Rey songs together is an integral part of the lesbian bonding process
His mom knocked on the door during morning sex because we were being too loud...now i have to meet her for the first time
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