note to self..putting cheap vodka in a bottle of grey goose does not make it taste better
It is obvious to me now why clam chowder & beer aren't a good combo.
our night together was a product of my beer goggles and jennifer aniston-like desperation.
Just so you know you don't have to worry about me picking up any guys tonight. The Hilton is hosting guests from the North American Gay Volleyball Association and the Comic Palooza
Only I can have a panic attack in the back seat of a cop car and have them move me to the front seat.
Playing basket ball at the park with random people that showed up at 1am. the division of teams is based on what drugs people are on
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
I'm going to get like 25 drinks at their wedding and just leave them sitting around or give them to hobos.
I'm running on 2 hours of sleep. Just spent 6 minutes staring at the back of my hand thinking: "I don't really know this that well"
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
Oh man 11pm. That means it's time to take my shirt off an eat a brownie
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
I have rug burns on my nipples. Thanks for being an awesome wing girl.
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
I know I'm drunk but why am I receiving this handjob through the pant leg of my shorts..?
Randomize
