Three words: puerto rican gang bang
I realized courtney is my jiminy cricket but instead of preventing me from telling lies she prevents me from fucking strangers
i might have gotten away with it if "don't tase me bro!" wasn't the first thing i said when i rolled down my window.
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
Its like after 6 beers, the clap doesn't scare me anymore.
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
Yeah, I probably scared him away when I drunkenly told him we'd have beautiful children
I didn't know what to do with her so I just tied her to a bench.
I mean it's not my fault he had a floor mat that read "put out or get out". What was I supposed to do?
I was talking about you wanting my dick, but that works too
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
If it wasn't for the fact that I drink during my lunch break I'm pretty sure I would have quit this job by now
Got really high to see my fist college experience unfold. Too high to find my classroom but I found the McDonald's down the street
Hey babe! Random question. Do you by chance have the pic of my nipples covered with ninja turtles band aids? Thanks.
WTF DOES CAROLINE HAVE GLASS IN HER FACE
Randomize
