So i looked up from her cooch and there was her ex-boyfriend
Awkward
he accidentally used the toothbrush i use to induce my bulemia...i feel like this is something he shouldnt find out...
He said "I know I'm not gay. I fucked a guy once and didn't like it"
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
Went to get my tattoo today. Found out the piercing girl is bi. I may just get my nipples done to get hit on tomorrow. Confidence is low these days.
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
I literally told her "she's a sandwich I'd like to make" and that's all it took
Lets be real here, you loved it when I was on top. With and without the machete.
I told my dad my stomach hurt and he bet me ten bucks I couldn't throw up on command. He has no idea what I did last night and I got ten bucks.
I'm eating captain crunch out of a cup half full of beer so idk
You handed J your Mayan-pocalypse shopping list and told him he wasn't getting laid unless he brought everything on it. Where is he supposed to get a live goat?!
I have to finish a biography for history and write a review on it so naturally I was like "getting high will make this more bearable" and now I'm basically inside the book at the revolutionary war with this guy.
No no no he wouldn't talk to me before I showed his best friend how good I am at twerking
She walked up to me and whispered "I hope you're good at sex" and led me to the beach.
I don’t know how to sext. What do you say? What do you don’t say?
Just start quoting WAP lyrics.
Randomize
