how about we just leave your boyfriend out of this
i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
i just got the best bj of my life in the pastors office at church.. Youre right jesus really does love me.
the beat of "birthday sex" is shockingly similar to my dry heaving rhythm. it's making me nauseous all over again.
The crowning achievement of my weekend was hooking up with someone I'm at least facebook friends with.
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
Hey, I can't find my bed frame. Do you know who took it?
Steve is gonna hang his bear rug on the wall because he doesn't trust us not to have sex on it...
Standing in a circle of girls fistpumping to the word "hospital" while taking shots.... I don't see this ending well, but its fucking fun.
I'm drunk eating a quesadilla while this kid is tryina come over and I'm just like no. I want the quesadilla.
Nobody wants to date "Eats Taco Bell Secretly In Her Car" Girl
Whoever put the life size cut out of Snoop Dog next to me in bed understands me.
I've officially slept through a hurricane, a tornado and had sex during an earthquake. I'm surviving.
I'm pretty sure I hallucinated the existence of an entire human being last night.
I feel like a grown up and it scares me so I'm hiding out in the bathroom stall and messaging you
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