someone get that fucking seahorse.
Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
you can't exactly throw up or pass out at the pentagon so i had to pull my shit together
So I woke up today with someone's door knob in my pocket. I hope everbody else got out of the house ok.
just tripped. bootyfest 2012 will be my engagement party. i saw the whole future. i'm moving to the beach.
He came on my face. Threw a towel at me. Stole my weed. And left. I thought this would be over after we graduated?
You rode him down the last flight of stairs like a human sled.
On that note I give you a 10 for sticking the landing and staying on the whole ride.
Sounds like sex on a twister board.
An idea that is both hilarious and intriguing...
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
But if I live with you I'll help pay rent. Only if you promise no 50 shades of what the fuck internet hookups
When you wake up with a bow tie and mustache drawn on your penis, you know you had a good night.
I went out with a plan. I came home with a Brian. THIS WAS NOT PART OF THE PLAN.
This hangover is too legit right now. I just sneezed and almost puked
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??
Randomize
