I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
You got off, kissed my dick and whispered "stay hard" to it, puked and then got right back on top of me like nothing happened...
i just realized i dont have a sober facebook picture since 2007
You were pretty dunk by the time you introduced the vase as your best friend.
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
I will cut you
Oddly enough thats the second time today someones said that to me
Put that in perspective
Doing lines off a plate that says, "things go better with coke."
I think I am calling out of work due to a hangover. I'm 96% sure there ISN'T tampon stuck inside me.
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
BECAUSE THIS IS AMERICA AND DONUTS AND TITTIES AND ALCOHOL IS WHAT THIS COUNTRY WAS FOUNDED ON
I yelled kanye while he was fucking me. It just felt right
Fun Fact: I do not remember what its like to be sober between drinking off and on for two weeks at my "vacation" and being on painkillers for my mouth now
Dude...are you really going to start sexting during our friend's memorial service?
Try to fuck my roomie AND steal my slippers: you are no longer my favorite cousin.
Randomize
