The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
I don't like finding out that my fuck buddy is a good person.
I still can't believe you had sex with someone who willingly went by Peaches.
Lost my virginity in a banana suit. Glad I waited.
I'm sorry for the texts and anything that I said that may have caused confusion, pain or irritation. I shall not be drinking again. Furthermore I will not be keeping a phone on me should I fail to adhere to the prior statement.
It's still to early in our relationship to tell her I was sleeping in my car
I made my own utility belt like Batman. It has a cup holder for my beer, cell phone holder, a little pocket for condoms, and a sewing kit just in case.
Of course I have a pirate flag
YOU CAN'T JUST ADD EVERYONE WHO ENTERS MY VAGINA ON FACEBOOK WTF
I HAD TO PAY A COVER FOR THE FIRST TIME LAST NIGHT. My tits didn't get me in and I was so pissed.
We were covered in sweat and glitter, making out onstage, in front of everyone. I think it was a good night.
He was gone for 5 minutes, opened the car door and said, "Don't eat my shit." and dropped Chipotle on the passenger seat. He was gone for another 10 minutes and came back with Coldstone. That stoned.
If you left your bike out in front, I just watched some dude steal it.
Randomize
