Ask me how many people I've slept with. Because its changed since I last saw you.
I saw you 20 MINUTES AGO. You need to stop this.
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
Yeah the sex got weird after I said "who's your daddy?" and she actually moaned her dads name.
In my defense it was my birthday and I really wanted to do it.
I fell asleep to the sounds of them banging in the next room. It was oddly soothing...
You going to have to be more specific than the night we blew an 8ball off the toilet..
and you wish you could be eating a cookie right now. but all you get to eat is a penis
THEY ARE MY AGE. THEY ARE YOUR LITTLE SISTER'S AGE THIS IS A DELICATE MATTER. CAPS LOCK
She said she wanted to have closure sex.
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
well I was pissed. first he yelled at me for having my own condoms, then he got mad when they didn't fit him. Dude, I only fuck magnum men.
Why are there jello shots in the kitchen drawer?
Since when do you jog?
Since hot shirtless guy that lives across the street jogs
How many times have we said we'd stop taking Jell-O shots with strangers?
I just talked with someone about real estate trends in Atlanta then got three blowjobs in a row. Boom.
Randomize
