You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
Someone in my history class just FB messaged me saying they highly suggest I put my sunglasses on. He is sitting 18 rows in front of me...
just added God to my list of friends who can only see my limited profile on facebook. its such a relief to know that He can't watch me fuck up my life anymore.
It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
I didn't take her seriously until she snorted that ramen noodle flavor packet...
I don't appreciate you drunk dressing passed-out me in spandex for bed
so, does the "dick the size of your forearm" thing run in the family then?
i told him i should keep a toothbrush at his house for after all the times i threw up there. he said yes but i wasnt getting a key to the apt
You should make a checklist to ensure they are quality material. Here's mine: wearing shoes, not drunk, very hot, has teeth, speaks english. You never know
Anddon't worry about me I have my Darth Vader flashlight
On another note; I'm three days away from being 1/12th of my way from not having sex for a year. I need to get laid.
I am the worst person to have nipple rings I'm hanging ornaments off of then and sending everyone a tits the season to be jolly
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
I think he fucked my hip out of place.
She grinded so hard on my face that I've got rugburn on both eyelids
Randomize
