Apparently mediocre decisions were made last night. I woke up alone in my own bed with my fridge defrosted.
And I didn't go to bed alone. I am buckets of fail.
i just drank a strangers drink off a toilet
Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7.
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
Slutapocalypse this thursday. Invite every freshieee you hooked up with this semester to my house. Think of it like a meet n greet for them and battle of the sluts for us.
If you ever bitch out on 72oz margarita night again, this friendship is over
Dude, he threw a pool chair off of an 8 story building. It was a successful night I'd say.
I can affiliate each flavor of Copenhagen to a different one night stand. I really love Texas.
I feel like im becoming the girl who only drunk texts him. I would be in the dog house, if situations like this had dog houses.
I just figured out how I'm going to tie you to my bed. Hint: I may have to go to the auto parts store before you get here.
Sadly, she's the porn star that got away
You walked in wearing nothing but a beekeeper mask
Great. I broke up with him before he could like my selfie, now I'm down a like.
nothing like a long car ride to make you think of all the bad things you've done
Randomize
