The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
I found your twin in sf. His name is ryan. And you are the evil one.
so whats your words to drink to for the state of the union? mine are 'change' 'fight' and 'you know'.
mine is 'the'.
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
i just ran into our bio chem professor at the bar. apparently, he doesn't follow the "no slapping your students' asses" rule.
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
Thanks for convincing the hot dog guy to give me one for $1 after I drunkenly dropped the first one. I loved your reasoning "I know you mark that shit up! I work in retail!"
By the way, we're gonna have to get a new rug for the livingroom i kinda started ours on fire...
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
We enjoyed our moment of partial gayness together
Will do. If it all falls thru I'm just gonna set up a sprinkler in my back yard and run thru it while taking jello shots. Perfect alternative to my 29th bday.
Pizza and koolaid didn't even make me feel better. This hangover means business
Leave it to me and my dad to puke on the same guy at the same bar 25 years apart
in other news i got caramel vodka poured on me. upside, i smell amazing
According to the office gossip the new secretary is “a homewrecking whore”. Think I should spend $27 on a fake wedding ring?
Yes! Want that picture of you and my nephew?
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