I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
The police are arresting two women who got in a fight for the last Twilight DVD at Best Buy. Classic.
I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
So after I pop out this baby we need to just go on a monthlong coke binge so I can get skinny again before vegas
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
I think this hangover is going to kill me. If it succeeds I would like you to read a dramatic rendition of 'Trapped in the closet' complete with interpretative dance at my funeral.
I threw up in the shower, slipped, and fell in it. Should I try and continue my day or just get back in bed?
it was either a cry for help or you were gargling vodka. we didnt care either way.
Her vagina smelled like pancake batter. That's all you need to know.
the cashier ate half of our fries before she gave them to us so i think it's safe to say they don't do drug testing there
The number of males in the usa getting circumsized are decreasing. Keep this in mind when we become cougars
I'm pretty sure I made out with a guy in a man thong.
Is it bad that I tried to build an outfit based around "What do people who use condoms look like when they buy condoms?"
I can't remember the last time I saw a penis in person that I didn't see a million times on text first
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
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