don't worry. When rigor sets in, we'll make sure to get you laid one last time.
i can't tell if you're serious or not, but 420 is gonna be pirate themed
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
Did i throw a brick at someone last night?
He's basically wearing those Nike boner sweatpants. It's hard not to jump him. How has your day been?
I ended up naked with smirnoff caps on my nipples. Dignity is now a completely foreign concept to me.
Would be fun, plus since its in public I'll keep my penis in my pants
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
I got whiskey, so I think the blizzard and I are at an even match
You came home And decided to make beer battered bacon... That's why there was smoke
Which one of you drunk assholes put a parental lock on my cable box last night? More importantly, what's the pin? I'm missing the UK game.
I told her I was going to masterbate myself into a coma... We have another date on Thursday.
I don't want his dick, I want his flame thrower!!
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
The reason why I poison my organs is so that you guys can't sell them.
Randomize
