Dude. I haven't taken a shit in a week.
Try anal, it works wonders.
He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
Remember when the only STD we had to worry about were hickies? Those were the days
yea i guess its safe to say fire extinguishers are not synonymous with whip cream cans
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
Do you think she will like "you don't have to swallow this time" gift certificates for Xmas?
I think we should have realized the night was going to be nuts when it started with a bum dying in front of my house.
Sure. But we have to be quiet.
Ninja mode activated
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
Guess who's the proud owner of her very own foxtail butt plug!!
Look, he's a hot korean guy with a motorcycle and a great ass. I'm gonna do head-titingly kinky shit with him.
Wait an hour then go and untie him. Bring toilet paper and some spare underwear. Want anything from Starbucks?
Never in my life have I been so excited to nap as I am right now.
What do I have to do?! Spell it out for him? Why can't he just plow me and pull my hair at the same time
You are my new hero
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