How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
you spent 5 minutes trying to open an empty PBR and kept saying "don't worry i'll get it i've been working out"
Vodka infused whipped cream. Shit just got real.
Were playing bathroom attendees at the party and making people wash their hands
i made a dollar
At no time is it ever okay for my doctor to compliment my tattoos, when giving me a physical exam.......
Still breathing?
Still breathing , but quite out of it. I think I hallucinated like 20 action sequences.
What.
I believe in weed hangovers. To say the least.
oh the usual. high as balls and crying about the hunger games.
We have hung out 5 times and only had sex 3 of those times. I'd call that friendship
Well start with a list of things you don't want to do... Like maybe 1) I don't want join Isis. That's a good start.
If you fold the laundry; booze and orgasms on me.
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
i feel like doing his laundry was not included in the job description when we became fuck buddies.
My drunk ass is being chauffeured around like the damn queen of England
sober me doesnt really want him anymore, but when drunk me takes over, she might want him, and god only knows the shit that might happen with drunk me.
Randomize
