naighbors jacking off again. i swear its his friday night ritual, its like he knows the night wont be ending in his favor
I love family holidays its the only time when playing beer pong, and smoking hookah with my family isnt looked down upon
over or under 1pm before my bracket is too blurry to read?
I just ate a cashew that looked EXACTLY like your dick.
Oh shit. The kids are pole dancing on a broom. It's like I'm seeing my future offspring before my eyes.
Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
i can recognize that vagina from a mile away
apparently we spent 30 minutes inside that big Nike store turning all of their Duke gear inside out. for some reason the employees didn't stop us.
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
I was blacked out when we met, so basically this will be a blind date.
I was so horny last night, I failed to let him know about my current bed bug infestation.
So glad I can hide money in my wallet and drunk me is too stupid to find it. Hangover sushi ftw.
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
A guy caught me talking to a sock today in the Laundry room if it makes you feel any better
Sadly that does. Why...where you talking to a sock
Bc I didn't know him and I asked him where he came from and why he was hanging out with my thongs
Randomize
