You screamed 'pound me, you big thick stud.' I looked around for porn cameras.
Shut up. I did not.
I really wish I was making that up.
Best moment of my life. I just got a text from some random number that said i can't wait to touch you. Her name is kiara and she had the wrong number.
What happened?....
He lifted up the blanket, and whispered "Don't do it" to his sperm....
today i learned why jack sparrow loved rum so fucking much
says the girl that drank her shots like they were in a dog bowl
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
i'm about to tell me dad "sorry staying in isnt an option. i'm fucking a marine tonight."
Dude, I brought the fucking tequila to that party and they cheered for the chick that seriously only brought limes.
I woke up to the sound of him repeatedly tapping out SOS in Morse Code using his hard cock.
Definition of cool: he wants a back tattoo of three horses running through a "paisley explosion"
How did he even become this person? Like what drugs has he done??
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
After we had sex he told me it was a "goodbye gift". We haven't talked since.
I sent you a snap of me in the bath, and you sent me a snap of a taco. An actual taco.
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
Come over. Bring drugs. My sister is making cookies. She took Valium. They should be badass cookies.
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