I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
my mom just walked in on me furiously masturbating while reading twilight. needless to say, im officially out of the closet.
For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
I'm drinking early times at a fridays on wednesday night. This entire bar is going to see my dick by last call.
just walked past a girl in her cap and gown puking her brains out beside a tree. her friends were taking pictures of her.
Dude with the Beatles haircut just got his pilots license and wants to take us up to do a case race mid flight. Don't tell me networking is unnecessary.
I'm still trying to figure out how you came back with chinese food, and a spoon covered in icing saying 'cake..'
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
His roommates came in and started a dance party in his room while we were having sex. He said it wasnt the first time.
Ive seen his manscaping faults. Given the choice I'd rather dry hump a cactus
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
It's settled. One of us is going to bang her brother. The world demands justice and he's hot. We'll be the justice league if it were made of alcoholic whores
I'm trying to be sexual and you're sending me smashmouth lyrics
I'd like to have a moment of silence for all the dicks she's broken off
It’s official. I’ve hooked up with all three brothers now
You should go after Dad now
I should! He’s definitely middle age fuckable
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