Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
Haha crisis adverted. Just told my dad I need to bone this guy. Nbd. He totes understands
He wasn't eating out, he was performing a hysterectomy without a license....should I be worried about my future family?
I got a second ticket last night for drunkly using my one call to order a pizza and get it delivered at the police station
So instead of asking me for my number, he asked for my dad's because he wanted to "thank the man that helped create those tits."
I just remembered that last night I ate nachos off of someone else's table with a stranger
My father is flirting with a transexual server at hamburger mary's. We can never tell him.
He came on my pillow pet. That's unacceptable. I hate boys.
We are so drunk half our team had to bowl with a chaperone. We won every game. We drink
Yeah if I don't text back. I'm eating. sleeping. Or lifting. Or drinking. Or playing call of duty. Like shit man
She had a tattoo of Luke Bryan on her thigh and she made me waffles. Can I have two fiancees?
we fucked and then he hand fed me a hot pocket
He says the sweetest things but also that he wants to choke me when we fuck so it's kinda perfect.
He paid for a 5 star hotel suite and I raided the mini bar after he left. I think that’s bad karma. Want some pringles?
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
Randomize
