he just tried to lick my eyebrow. thats the deal breaker.
so I told him I hadn't been laid since Bush was president. Right after he cums, he says "Welcome to the Obama Administration".
You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
Life lesson learned last night, if you are too drunk to use the atm leave the strip club
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
I say we start a new tradition. I came up with it all by myself. It's called work out, lay out, black out
Remember when puke and rally meant a good time? Fuck pregnancy
We could all 3 jump out of a cake in just tophats. A true marble cake.
I messaged him asking for his address. He replied with the address then said, "If you're gonna stalk me, I'm the third window on the side and usually get naked around 8am and anytime randomly after 6pm (listen for music).. If you're sending anthrax, I'm 6'2" 225lbs so send a good amount."
this is the first time in over a year I had a pregnancy scare and actually would have known who the father was. I guess this is what adulthood feels like.
The guy behind me is talking about how his life goal is to use his knowledge of mathematics to make the world a better place. My only life goal right now is getting through this lecture without throwing up in my lap.
My ex's new girlfriends ex boyfriend is getting me my nipples pierced for Valentine's Day so who's the real winner here
the night was just a blur of sex and pie
Grilled cheese and shark week. Unemployment done right.
Randomize