ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
i woke up completely naked except for a bottle of beer saran wrapped in between my boobs
The difference between you and me last night was that I didn't remember getting into the cab and you didnt know we were in one.
He was pretty wasted I guess, but the crippled guy threw the first punch it was awesome
You told me to pour the Gatorade on you "like Flashdance"
He was going down on me as I discovered a spaghetti-O on my boob. Its been a while since I faked it.
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
Except if I'm having sex. In which case you're in the bed with us or out of the room. No halfsie participation.
Is 1:30 too early for the bar?
Do you want my opinion or society's?
I want your company
I'm pretty sure I just orgasmned my way out of paying for that weed
Need to find a Santa hat to fit my penis, he deserves to be festive too.
Remember when I got punched in the face on NYE last year? I don't
That moment that random you banged behind the bar is going to be your son's third grade teacher... yup I'm there.
he called me his ex's name during sex then proceeded to cry while still in me
I visited the library for the first time in my college career tonight and I got laid. I think I'm gonna come back...
Randomize
