Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
she just announced that once she was paid to deep throat a light saber with a mint flavored condom on it. i'm speechless.
I just remember taking her cat for a walk around 3 am then falling asleep in a slide at the park
We've been here 3 hours and the only 1 word answer she didn't give was the drink order. Don't think I'm getting laid tonight
This dude was wearing a "Plan B- One Step" backpack. I wonder how many more I have to buy until I get mine??
Update: I only have one shoe. The other one now belongs to the gods of jello-wrestling. May it rest in peace.
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
Bring my gorilla suit and my bong.
Oh its going to be that type of weekend?
You know you're baked when you feel your throat closing up from an allergic reaction to the pecans in the cookie you're eating but you keep eating the damn cookie.
So I put a beer on your bed and jumped on th3 other side of the bed like in the commercials. You my good sir, owe me a budweiser that your bed drank.
I'm pretty sure your ex of four years just had a baby with some kid and named it after you...
But I got head on a boat yesterday which was sweet until a bald eagle flew over. Then it became life affirming.
I yelled out "blow jobs!" in my macroeconomics class. Ask me more about how my life is spiraling out of control.
I can't. I'm going camping this weekend. I do have a life outside of your dick.
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