I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
of course. lets lasso hookers.
She celebrated a negative pregnancy test by going out to Quizno's. I really don't understand her at all.
Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
So I purposely left a bunch of metal in my pockets so that the smokin hot TSA officer would give me a pat down. Airport security just got fun
Plus apparently whenever one of her friends loses their virginity they get a party with a funfetti cake which I found funny
I woke up to her vacumming the grass
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
I never thought I'd say this, but there is a life threatening amount of rumpleminz in our freezer
Oh, honey. If you're seeing a girl just for the sex, never doubt that she knows and she's doing the same thing. We're not stupid, we're just craftier than you.
If my penis could make facial expressions, it would constantly have a smile on.
You just put lesbians and Hogwarts in the same sentence. Of course I'm in.
I love you as a roommate, but you GOTTA start using the door dude..
Randomize
