Call me so I can make it juicy for ya
angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
Why do you apologize after every time we have sex?
Does slim fast make a chocolate heart for valentines? If so that's what she's getting.
There's a naked kid on the floor on your side of the bed. Don't freak out when you wake up. I think we need to fix the lock on the door...
Things got a little weird when he fired up his homemade flamethrower in the living room.
at least the cop wrote "happy birthday" on the ticket.
Nah I've been there. The worst you'll see is some hobo peeing in a sewer at 3 am on a Saturday
Napping in front of family members can be embarrassing when you get a christmas boner in your sleep
He slapped my ass... He best ask me out. Or figure out how to unslap my ass.
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
Saw your dad at the bar last night... And again this morning when he left. Told you not to mess with me bitch.
So adding to the list of things my boobs can do, sweeping with a broom is apparently a thing.
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
Every time I look at him 'Relax' by Frankie Goes to Hollywood plays in my head. Is that weird?
Randomize
