She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
best part he said "i like your tattoo" as he walked into the room, stood right there looking at me, naked on top of his friend
three words: i give head
three words: not that well
I'll just wear something slutty to the liquor store and hope for the best
that's your solution for everything
I took my vicodin with tequila. I can FEEL gravity...
Well on a lighter note, guess who just threw up in the elevator
Ps. The strap-on in the pic i sent you last night was not mine. Just wanted to clear that up.
Just for future reference: milk is NOT a good mixer no matter how drunk you are.
Count me out. I seem to have semen induced blindness in one eye.
So, this year for my birthday, want to get rip-roaring schmammered and watch my episode of my super sweet 16? We can do lines off my tiara.
I stole all of the toasting champagne and did an interpretive dance to "wind beneath my wings". I am literally everything you're not supposed to do at weddings.
But your showmanship is impeccable.
Do you feel better now that you've sent me a picture of your dick?
Yep.
My New Years resolution is actually to be MORE petty
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns
Randomize
