New low: just hacked my moms facebook
She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
OMG. if college stays like this, theres no way i wont be pregnant by first semester
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
So you have no knowledge as to why I am hearing loud repetitive mooing from next door?
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
You always have that cute deer in the headlights look. Thats what made showing you my penis for the first time so disconcerting.
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
Going to be a long day. text me later. Sorry I puked in your sink.
If it makes you feel any better, I'm eating a block of cheese...
He had really great hair, but he told me he's been in a psych ward three times. I mean I know I'm a psych major, but that's too much.
The dog just shocked himself by peeing on Christmas lights, should I have saw that coming?
You used your chihuahua as a pillow screaming "HE'S A PILLOW AND A PET" and proceeded to puke in the dog bed
she grabed my junk and started making lightsaber noises
I wonder if you could get her in a metal bikini
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