My insides feel lik shag carpet. It is awesome
The only thing better than Call of Duty is getting jerked off while playing Call of Duty.
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
considering I showed up there after a xanax, 2 bottles of champagne and some coke, no shirt and someone else s husband... I'm sure you can figure that one out.
Showerbowl immediately followed by pullups naked. I feel like fucking Tarzan
I mean, with your nipple problem im surprised. #hangacoatonem
First time since we broke up that I'm not drunk before noon...win for broken hearts everywhere
As soon as I got there, you appeared out of no where, yelled "they're giving away free cigarettes!" in my face and then disappeared and I didn't see you the rest of the night.
Basically I will actually need a reindeer pulled sleigh to make it to all the penises in one night.
Your cousin just directly asked you for nudes
I'm not strong. I'm hormonal, sad, lonely, and trying to get laid via tinder
I guess you know it was a good night when you find your ripped underwear in your pocket, and a nerf bullet falls out of your pant leg 😂😂
I'm a mess. I mean I almost got off but I'm a fucking rubics cube down there so il givenhim the point
how do i say "cradle the balls" in Italian
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
Randomize
