you asked the guy at 7-11 if he remembered when you came in and threw news paper every where... then you did it again
I cut holes in my blanket and put my arms through it. It's the sleeveless "Bro Edition" Snuggie.
seriously when did my vagina become a soup kitchen for the poor
Recently successful and happy relationships are at an all time high now that you are no longer fucking so many peoples girlfriends. You alone have changed the mating patterns in the lower half of our county.
You need to stop relating my life to your schoolwork. But tell my girlfriend that she'd be proud.
She just kept saying "bless your heart" to him while he cried because he came so fast. I think a Texas woman was just what he needed
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL??
Wednesday is good, I needed the head count for the orgy, caroling can happen with as few as 2 people. There will be a pinata.
For the caroling or the orgy?
I was so horny last night, I failed to let him know about my current bed bug infestation.
How many more times can I say I need to get laid before you kill me?
i was making a gravity bong in my room and my dad walked in. he helped me finish. i love being home for the holidays.
While all of the skanky girls from the crowd got on stage we screamed fair game and scoped out all their boyfriends, she made out with 2, this is what we call taking advantage of the situation
So um... You probably shouldn't post that picture of me and your crotch just because that's a new level of raunchiness that I'm not willing to accept yet
I once went to target high on hydrocodone. I assure you, they can handle unrespectable.
Can you cover for me after lunch? I’ve never seen a guy who cums as much as my new Side Dick so now I need to clean the house before my husband gets home
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