Where is the hickey?
you announced to the whole room that instead of shaving you were planning to start straightening and then braiding your pubes. awkward silence followed by everyone leaving.
Convinced the bartender that I'm a congressman. Free Drinks. God bless America.
even the sluttiest version of myself will not go down on him
He was doing push ups, crunches and jogging in place in front of the restaurant. I'm not too sure I want to eat there if it requires immediate exercise following the meal.
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
So my niece decided to play "lets make shapes out of your bruises" with me and told me that one of them looks like a shark bite. Bravo, sir. Bravo.
I cartwheeled across every street... They tried to stop me but I bit anyone who came near me
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
It feels like New Years Day all over again...me trying desperately not to throw up in the backseat & mom and dad blissfully unaware in the front
It's like my uterus was saying, "hey, you're not pregnant, but imagine if you were!"
Not sure if creeper guy is too drunk to talk or I'm too high to listen.
I bought emergency contraception until I / we decide how to handle that. And target gave me a gift receipt for it. Awkward.
Meeting up with one of your students at your drug dealers house is always an awkward moment
Randomize
