I feel like my sweat is 40 proof right now
she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
Oh my god he is having a sentimental moment right now.
He just sent me like a really heartfelt confession of love in which he ended with "make the apt, I'll hold your hand while you get your clit pierced."
Why are all the lights on in my house? Every single one. Someone should turn them off but I'm the only one here and I'm sure as hell not doin it.
took 4 advil with a shot of vodka, figure i'd try to save myself now
Lots of alcohol last night skiing this morning = me throwing up off chairlift
Using your ex girlfriend's little brother to pick up women at the a&p: priceless
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
Starting St Patrick's Weekend, non stop flights on Pacific Whorelines to the scenic HotMessXpress. Get the cougars ready, it's gonna get weird.
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
I checked her ID this morning. Lets just say...she's older than my mom
And remember people can't hear you kick ass in space
R.I.P my virginity. TOD 12:37pm
100000% expect a picture of my ass in them
Randomize
