I just wanted to draw pictures of limp wieners on peoples doors and smash pictures of palm trees. That's it.
I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
im marching my happy ass in there and im not leaving until he cheats on his girlfriend!
I got drunk and threw up on a kid at the amusement park. I think they're pressing charges.
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
Her little brother walked in right as I was finishing and was like "uhhh hey there's a lunar eclipse outside"
Somehow I magically turned down a threesome last night. On my birthday. You're a horrible wingman.
You have to keep an eye on her tonight cause you know how she likes to pickpocket people when she's drunk.
Thanks for your number, i want to ski with you, do party with you and sleep with you. Lucas.
I will take a blow job from a dude that kinda looks like a girl at this point
OMG CHARGE YOUR PHONE I NEED TO KNOW IF THIS IS A GOOD PICTURE OF MY ASS
We let 3 boys take us home and then we woke up in the middle of the night, stole all the coozies out of the house, a loaf of bread, a case of water, a pair of shorts, called a cab, and went home.
there are no losers in shot checkers. only winners.
I'm taking a shower and i'm gonna bring my pocketknife with me
Um..... I have taste. The only thing I am going to bedazzle is my vagina.
Randomize
