Tell your sister I'm no fool. Or at least romanticize the notion of the fool.
she cant drink. allergic to alcohol.
ewwww. she might as well have a dick.
He kept referring to his penis a his "love gun"
Some kids in a school bus just saw me jacking off in my car. This is how 89% of children find out about sex.
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
If it meant we had chicks like that every weekend I would gay marry the shit out of you dude
I am honestly trying to remember his name. All I can remember is that he had a weird mole, a daughter and a lot of cocaine. Please stop letting me pick up at gay night.
I hope one day I make out with someone in a taco truck :(
I'm glad I inspire you to reach for the stars
Or a taco
Like please, take your microdick and try to stick it someplace else. It is not welcome in my world.
Just walked by the neighbors and they are definitely butt naked sitting on a bed, watching Netflix, baked out of their minds, with the blinds open.
Welcome to Bellingham.
Is it ironic that our divorce court is a block from where we had our reception? Or is it just sad? Alanis has confused my understanding of irony.
Something like, "Merry Christmas. I hope Santa shits in your mouth."?
You should of known that i was high if i refer to myself as melting into anything
Why did you have to tell me he has a hammer cock? Now I can’t stop staring at his pants.
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
Randomize
