Call me Kermit cause I'm about to go piggin
They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
No it wasn't her, this girl had both hands.
there are so many fish in the see you have left to fuck
the crazy preacher outside Willard just began a monologue that began with "when i look at a vagina." We should stop by there more often
well when mom kept referring to my "black hole of a vagina" and how i devoured all the nuts at the party like i was a pro, i figured my stay was up.
Yea... you were given too many get out of jail free cards. God just gave up on you having a healthy and happy vagina.
When a guy wants to eat something off you and then comes back with microwaved strudel and custard, back the fuck out. I have apple-chunk burns on my tits.
Yeah, he's passed out in my bathroom pantsless. Is it a faux pas to look at his penis?
If you find my purse on your yacht please call me - girl you slept with after yacht party
Was asked out on a date tonight on Linked In. That creepy genius at apple that touched my butt one time in the back stairwell. I thinks it's fair to say I've hit rock bottom.
You called his parrot a seagull, a pigeon and a rat with wings, and told it to go eat Cheetos out of a dumpster.
I literally forgot every French word I knew and blurted out “mange moi” so he went down on me like I was some baguette fresh outta the oven!!!! I passed out.
Randomize
