Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
After last night, I've decided I will now bang only men who professionally ride things for a living. I will accept jockeys, cowboys, bullriders, and pro bicyclists who lie and say they're bullriders.
Last night was the twilight zone. We hungout with our 45 year old future selves and tried to fuck everything with a dick. Lets move forward from this.
Because at some point last night we decided that shotgunning beers from a paint stick was a good idea
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
there was so much lube in my brother's closet...
It's cuz all she eats is salt lick, human souls, and fast food
One of your snapchats was of you with a 40oz of Mickeys and the caption: "Deep Throat back in her natural habitat"
Yeah we invited her back for chicken nugget sandwiches
Someone somewhere has a picture of me vomiting in a bus stop trash can while a drag queen held my hair for me.
Pride claims another victim
The amount of drunk I'm going to get tonight will be somewhere between Jim lahey and bojack horseman
I'm over being sad. I'm now onto thinking about all the ways in which he is a total fuckwaste
i can believe you didnt get any, i was wing-girling the shit out of him
all you did was repeatedly scream GET IT IN
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
Randomize
