i'm pissing behind 7/11. if you guys leave... i'll think it's funny too
So remember when i bet you that girl uses dick to validate her existence?
...yea
She's valid.
And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
I'm telling people I'm celibate. It sounds cooler when it's by choice.
Just passed on a threesome. I'm too old for that kind of morning after.
Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok
Just so were clear I meant the head your face is on
These girls just walked into this party as reverse cowgirls... Wearing cowboy clothes all backwards
And my coffee table looks like something out of Scarface
Also, if he asks how he's doing orally I can probably ask if we're exchanging Christmas presents?
Do me a favor and don't mention him I feel like Regina George and I just want to scream I made him
I ate 1200 calories worth of chocolate covered marshmallows and googled why it is okay to be single forever
I am luring the porn star to my house with chicken!
Theres a woman here with grey hair that im pretty sure i would have sex with
Randomize
