is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
I glued a penny on the door Tricia believes its Patrick Swayze haunting our apartment. Fuckin potheads.
I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.
Just got new surround sound speakers for my computer... I feel like I'm actually IN the porn now.
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
He titled his birthday party on facebook, "BJ's in PJ's- an adult slumber party." I'm the only one invited.
Someone just bought me a one liter long island and call me maybe is on. I'm going to die
Can you check on Mike in the bathroom. It's been like 20 min.
He's fine. He's just standing at the trash can in line for another beer from the keg. Nbd.
He brought me breakfast in bed after our one night stand. Beer and Cheerios I may come back to this place
Officially conquered sex on my couch with my dad asleep in the next room
I like how you say "conquered" as if that was your sole mission in life
"YOU A2TE UNDERAGE LOL" Got that at 2am. Gotta stop dating alcoholics.
I found them in the bathroom trying to wrap an American flag around Steve's dick. I didn't bother to ask questions.
Our sub is singing "i believe i can fly" after yelling at the class this whole time and this is really hella weird
I met someone else! And I had a wonderful orgasm! And he wants to see me again, like take me out!
Well you could have stayed home, played house and got blow jobs all weekend babe, but we all have to live with our decision
Randomize