dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
Does my surprise involve the use of a safe word?
Probably.
I'm in.
I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
If I were trying to take advantage of you I would have maxed out all your credit cards by now.
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
She has 2500 facebook friends. I probably should have used a condom.
Company party. Just told vp "you look like a cat person"
ALL CAPS CUZ ITS SERIOUS SHAME.
Why do I only have half my beard? My chin is so naked...
She found my wedding ring, sallowed it and wished me good luck explaining it to my wife before walking out. Now what?
I can't wait to see you again...not a euphemism, just really looking forward to seeing you. Wanting to fuck you as often as possible just seems implied at this point.
But how MUCH of an emergency? Like, should I go to the ER now, or can it wait until after the bar crawl?
In other news, I tore a tendon in my hand from giving my boyfriend handjobs so that's how my day is going
Put viagra in his coffee. I did that with Geoff last month and three hours later I had bitten through a throw pillow and gotten a noise complaint from a neighbor
Randomize
