I like bacon cheeseburgers and the pussycat dolls
Does that mean you want me to loosen up your buttons at carls jr?
Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
he asked me if i had ever jacked off high and then referred to it as a "man-to-man question"
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
Walked into the bar with my burrito and ordered a round of shots for everyone. Not sure if I want to look at the credit card statement.
he broke off your car antennae to use as a walking stick before he smoked because he claimed to lack the facial strength needed to open his eyes when he's high
Im 95% ready to shit behind 711
Did you sleep with Connor? And who undressed me? There's a picture of two guys peeing out my bedroom window. What happened?
I just found a wine bottle in my shower. Must have been a good night.
Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised?
I just had sex in the footy bunny pajamas my mom bought me for christmas. Tis the season
All I need is a morbidly obese man masturbating at the other end of the car and I'll complete the CTA Horror Trifecta.
I mean I did fuck her boyfriend, the least I could do is post happy birthday on her Facebook wall.
He bent me in ways I couldn't imagine.. and im a gymnast.
Randomize
