i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
You're a big dope. Life is about fighting for what you want, not accepting what you hate.
Why does tequilla always make you text me?
He showed up to the Seder drunk and tried to convince everyone that he could read Hebrew.
Should you consider yourself out of control when everyone at the party is cheering you on while you're puking, and on the last heave you act like you're rolling dice right before the finale???
We've been here 3 hours and the only 1 word answer she didn't give was the drink order. Don't think I'm getting laid tonight
This has been the biggest binge-drinking season of the decade.
Did you pour a hundred fucking pounds of sand in my car last night?
lol... you weighed it?
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
Drunk me just left a note for sober me apologizing for all the fucking crumbs in our bed
Girl, he's like catnip for my pussy.
His favorite stripper is going to jail. He's taking it pretty hard
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
He nicknamed his dick "the fountain of youth" I think it's time to move on...
Well, thanks for not letting me sleep with anyone, but no thanks for telling everyone I have the clap.
Trust me, I’ve got a sixth sense about dicks that tells me if a guy knows how to fuck and it’s tingling. You need to prove me right!
I’m not going to bang him just to confirm your Dickth Sense
The Dickth Sense!!! I love it! It’ll be our first porno!
Randomize
