i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
Please dont jizz on my ds screen.
Just smoked a bowl with the exterminator. I think my day is more productive.
There comes a time in every girls life when she must use her boobs for good instead of evil.
Your pregnant arnt you
can't make this up: he's writing lyrics for the musical reenactment of how he met her @ an anime convention to perform at their wedding. yes, there'll also be dance routines involved.
We woke up under the ping pong table holding hands.
I just found that video of you jumping onto my exercise ball feet-first and face-planting into my shoe rack.
Ya. I wonder how much being a beard for a major league baseball player pays. This could be a lucrative arrangement...
All together there was 318 cigarette butts in the pool... And my microwave.
If your plan is to re-bang every girl you banged in high school - you're gonna need a spread sheet and clip board.
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
I puked so hard this morning that I peed my pants. I'm a gem.
Holy shit I'm 26! That took an embarrassingly long time to figure it out, I need to keep buyin weed from this kid
These are the things that make me so grateful... that I slept with your sister instead.
I am mildly hung over. Decided pants are very unnecessary right now.
Randomize
