I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
Just left a map of the Aleutian islands on this Eskimo girls face. Check one off my Alaska to do list.
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
Attention ladies coming to the party tonight! Tonight will be another chance to win the 5 bucks for getting my cousin hard. Bring your a-game, no one has been able to overcome the whiskey dick yet. Good luck.
I'm all about sex. But even I know there will be a time to retire my junk. And that will be my 40th birthday, or whenever I'm hideous
So Monday we're lesbians.
Deal. This decision is final and any rebates on this will result in losing an eyeball.
He's the only guy without a tacky accent I've seen in this southern dump in 6 months. Bangage was inevitable.
You're such a Yankee.
The most adult decision I've mad today was Jameson or Fireball? It's been a successful Day
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
Make sure you wash your hands. That seagull you threw was very sick.
saw a family tailgating a graduation with hard liquor... i'm assuming yours?
are you shitting me? they told me they'd at least wait until 10am
Does anyone remember last night? Because I still don't know why I now own a goldfish and a ceiling fan made of pizza?
my comprehension of H.D. Thoreau really dives after 8 beers.....
It will astound me if they ever let you graduate.
He sounds like Chris Tucker and wants to eat me out when I’m on my period. If that isn’t love I don’t know what is.
Randomize